Rethinking - marriage/divorce

My musings are about monogamous Christian marriage in Britain and not inclusive of any other religion as they differ greatly, some allowing various partners.

It wasn’t until the second century (about 110) that bishop Ignatius of Antioch wrote to bishop Polycarp of Smyrna:

"It becomes both men and women who marry, to form their union with the approval of the bishop, that their marriage may be according to God, and not after their own lust.”

So the whole idea of a marriage ceremony being connected with the Christian religion doesn't seem to have been the case in the first century church.  It wasn’t until the 16^th century that parental consent along with consent from the church became a necessary requirement.  Nowadays parental consent is only needed when one or both parties are under the marital age stipulated by law.

Divorce has been around as long as marriage.  Originally, it was enough for a man to state that he divorced his wife for it to be so.  In Old Testament times, it was not considered to be God’s will but little was actually done about it as it was such a common practice.  Jesus did speak against divorce saying that it was not what God had intended but also recognised the fact that life doesn’t always go according to plan.  After the 10^th century however, marriage was not available in this country until a few centuries later and then only for men of sufficient wealth to pay for the very expensive act of parliament required to grant the divorce. It wasn’t until the middle of the 19^th century that divorce was open to ordinary people.  It was still difficult for women to apply for a divorce as they not only had to prove adultery of the husband but also other serious problems such as rape, incest or cruelty.  It is a recognised fact that divorce is more common now than ever before but this is probably in part to the laws being changed and the fact that both men and women can apply on equal terms. 

In a survey done in 2004, the main causes for divorce were: adultery, extramarital affairs and infidelity – 27%; domestic violence – 17%; midlife crisis – 13%; addictions e.g. alcoholism or gambling – 6% and workaholism – 6%.  In the survey 93% of the divorces were petitioned by women and very few of them were contested.  Modern life differs greatly from only a century ago.  Women have careers and work outside of the home and the roles of husband and wife are different for each family depending on their work situation.  This can cause added strain on relationships and the rules of yesteryear no longer seem so relevant.  In 2009 it was recorded that in Britain 45% of marriages end in divorce, the number rising for second marriages.  This leads to larger and more complex family connections with ex-partners re-marrying and having other children. 

Family life is no longer so straight forward.  Marriage for life is still the hope for Christians but circumstances can change until sometimes to continue in the marriage can become intolerable.  I was quite taken aback and upset only a few months ago when a relative said that she felt she was unable to share on a social network, photos of her son’s recent marriage as both he and his new wife were both divorcees and most of their congregation disapproved of this.  This is not the case in many congregations but it is a sad reflection on the church as a whole (whatever any individual opinion may be) that those who are not part of the church construct feel that it is judgmental, exclusive and unwelcoming.  Those who are Christian and divorced are sometimes made to feel guilty of their past and unaccepted within the life of the church.  They mention their marital status in rather apologetic terms.  Life happens!  I’m sure God’s love reaches out to those who find themselves in such situations – maybe more so as they have need of some tender loving care.

While I still accept that marriage for life is the best thing, I acknowledge that often this is not what many experience.  Should someone who has made a mistake in their choice of marriage partner be condemned to pay for it for the rest of their lives?  Are they not entitled to find happiness and love because of some past mistake?  I have come across many who remain desperately unhappy in their marriage out of a sense of duty as a Christian and so feel necessity of ‘staying together’.  Surely if about half (45% in 2009 as mentioned before) of the adult married population are divorced then the church needs to be more relevant to the needs of people in the situations in which they find themselves today.  Maybe a little more tolerance, understanding, inclusive attitudes and a good dollop of mercy will help to show people that God does care about what happens in their lives. 

I must apologise for the way which this post looks. I wrote as normal but for some strange reason it has come out in white blocks!

Rethinking - sexuality

Some points of faith are never up for negotiation, like the belief that Jesus is the Son of God and that through His death and resurrection we can enjoy eternal life in God’s presence.  But there are some practices and culture changes that have occurred as humanity has progressed through the centuries – e.g. we no longer accept slavery as a way of life or burn people at the stake as witches because they use herbal remedies.  These practices we consider to be part of the ‘Dark Ages’.  And so today I think that there are issues that we should address and not remain with a dinosaur mentality.  I have been rethinking a number of such issues and hope to share my thoughts over the coming days/weeks.

We have heard much in the media lately about same-sex marriage and the whole sexuality issue.  I have looked at Bible-based arguments of Christians against homosexuality and have found that there are also verses which the pro-gay lobby also quotes in their favour.  It seems that whatever your stance, you will probably find some Biblical verse to support your claims.  Most people will quote Leviticus – the Jewish book of Law and Practice.  But Paul in Galatians says that we are no longer under the law but under the grace of God.  So my first question was – as a Christian, am I bound by the Jewish Law as it is written in Leviticus?  Other parts of the book we easily disregard but hold onto these verses about sexuality. 

On the other hand, research has been carried out over several decades in various countries and the conclusion is that most people experience little or no sense of choice about their sexual orientation.  And I keep going back to the verse in Matthew 19v12 where Jesus Himself, when talking about marriage, says, ‘For some are eunuchs because they were born that way, others were made that way by men … … ‘  Does that mean that some are born castrated or that they are born not being attracted to the opposite sex?  Would such people today be classed as gay/lesbian?  Yet Jesus accepts that this is a reality, some people just are that way inclined.

In the church of the 1^st century, Philip was told by God to go to the desert road where he encountered an Ethiopian eunuch who was reading the book of Isaiah, searching for truth.  Philip explained to him about Jesus and the eunuch was baptised.  Philip never questioned the man’s sexuality and as the directive came from God it is clear that God accepted him as he was.  Here was someone who would never be able to become heterosexual, no matter how much prayer and re-education he may receive (as many Christians believe is the answer nowadays) yet God cared for him and sent Philip to show him the way and baptise him, while still being a eunuch.

I have recently read a very well-written article by Steve Chalke (for the non-British he is a very well respected church leader) where he talks about the debate of the moment of same-sex marriage.  He says,

I'm worried that the noise of the arguments around gay marriage will cloud and confuse the real question for the Church, which is about the nature of inclusion. I am convinced that it is only as the Christian community grapples with this that we will find wise answers, not only regarding gay marriage, but also to related questions around the Church's wider attitude to gay people.

(You can read the full article here.) 

 Time and time again Jesus says and shows by his actions that His message is an all-inclusive gospel.  If we are to be brutally honest with ourselves, gay and lesbian people on the whole are not accepted in Christian circles.  We may accept them – on our terms but not as they are – unlike Philip in the book of Acts.  It is not our place to judge – that is God’s prerogative.  As Christians we are simply told to spread the gospel message, the rest is up to God.  Jesus died for all, regardless of sexual orientation.  He understood that some are that way inclined and said so.  So it seems to me that it is because I am a follower of Jesus that I should treat all with the same inclusive attitude and not exclude them from the kingdom where only God is judge. 

A Clear Out

Because of the bad weather yesterday, I decided not to go out but instead have a bit of a sort out.  After Christmas and a birthday the shelves and cupboards were looking very cramped and full.  So a sort out and declutter  were in order.  Believe it or not I have cassette tapes going back to the year dot!  I no longer use a cassette player (who does?) and so decided to get rid of them.  The charity shop in our street no longer takes tapes as they can't sell them and so it was in the bin with them ... ... except some that have a particular memory or special meaning for me and so are really hard to get rid of.  There were some of a very young Glen Campbell and does anyone remember Marty Robbins?  One tape was music of favourite films of the time - The Magnificent Seven, The Way We Were, Goldfinger, Lawrence of Arabia, A Summer Place ... ... Such memories of times long gone.

Apart from tapes I had a load of books that I had read and re-read I don't know how many times and they were taking up a lot of shelf space.  Now of course with Kindle and ebooks, again things have changed and the big, bulky and sometimes heavy books are no longer needed.  

How is it that cupboards seem to get cluttered with ornaments that never see the light of day?  I seem to be a magnet for knick-knacks that I don't use and they get pushed in a drawer or to the back of a cupboard.  Well, they are no more.  The snow is beginning to go and so this morning I bundled up those things I never use and took them up the street to the charity shop.  Ahh!!  That feels better!



It's amazing how good a clear out can make you feel.  It's almost a relief to get rid of things that you no longer use, want or need.  The house looks cleaner somehow with a bit more space.  The shelves aren't so cluttered and I can actually see what's in the cupboards.  I've been doing that with my own personal life and thoughts lately also.  I've mentally thrown a lot of old stuff out that was cluttering up my mind in order to move on and taking on board things that are more relevant to me now.  Some memories are, of course, very important to me and so I hold on to those.  They have had an influence on me and have made me the person I am but other things could hold me back in my onward journey in life.  I have changed my way of thinking about a number of things.  Who knows I might get round to blogging about them some day.

Presumptions

First I must say that there are no pictures today as I'm having problems with uploading them from My Pictures for some reason unknown to me!

Yesterday I went to my sister's house to spend a couple of hours together, as we do most weeks. I got the bus as usual in Stiby Road, showed the driver my bus pass and was about to tell him my destination when he handed me my ticket. The ticket printed out said that I was going from Stiby Road to the town centre. Actually I was going beyond that as far again on the other side of the town. But as most people getting on the bus at my stop go into town, the driver had presumed (wrongly) that I was going where most other people were going.

As my son and I share a house, we have on occasions received correspondence that is for both of us and addressed to Mr and Mrs Andradez. The sender presumed (wrongly) that we are husband and wife instead of mother and son. I can understand that usually a male and female of the same surname living in the same house would be a couple. I began to think how often I presume things about people that I don't actually know very well. It is easy to see someone and know a little about them and start building a picture about them that can sometimes be quite wrong, sometimes even offensive or hurtful. The tendency is to put people into categories, into boxes and treat them as a particular kind of person instead of an individual that might or might not be doing or thinking as most others in that situation might.

We presume certain things about Christianity too. Some think that going to a church building regularly is somehow a safe passage to Heaven. Yet Jesus says that not everyone who says 'Lord, Lord' will enter Heaven. So going through the motions, making the right noises and conforming to what the majority think is right is not in itself the key to the Kingdom. Some would say that if we follow God's leading and obey His voice then we are safe, that somehow we are protected in some sort of bubble, that it is some sort of insurance policy against mishaps and problems.  Again Jesus never promised that to His followers. In fact the Bible says that God makes the rain to fall equally on the bad and the good.  His promise is to guide us through difficulties not necessarily to avoid them altogether.  My friend Diane wrote in her blog about this. You can read what she says here under the post entitled 'Victory confused with Happiness'. 

So we need to take care not to presume that things are or will turn out a certain way. Follow God's leading - YES. Obey His voice -YES. But expect the unexpected, know that we can have troubles and dark days and uncertainties and times of being misunderstood. You may have made plans but don't presume that things will always turn out the way you thought they would. It's called life in the real world!

Looking back, looking forward

All the planning, adorning our homes, buying gifts and other preparations for Christmas have been and gone. They unfolded at their appropriate time as we celebrated the coming of Jesus into the world as a baby, each in our own way. It is now almost time to put everything back in their respective boxes and store them away for another year. In our home we had a wonderful family time together but my older son has now returned to his home in Cheshire and things are gradually returning to the way they were. The last couple of days we have tried to be creative in using up any left-overs. Yesterday the recycling lorry took away our torn Christmas wrapping paper, the varioius cardboard boxes and the empty bottles and so we begin to look forward to another year and whatever that will bring.



We look back over the past year and note things that have changed and hope for future dreams to be fulfilled. One of my favourite sayings is:

'Look back and thank god, look forward and trust Him.'

A few days ago I received an email with some noteworthy sayings that I am taking with me into the new year.

Happiness isn't a destination, it's the attitude with which to travel through life.

Objects were made to be used. People were made to be loved. Not the other way around.

A smile costs less than elecricity and gives off more light.

Friendship is one of the most beautiful gifts that God has given us to share.


I don't usually make New Year's resolutions but one I will try to keep is to live out those sayings.

Emmanuel

Part of God's beutiful creation (Malta)

We use the term ‘Emmanuel’ for Jesus particularly at this time of year – God with us.  Some seem to think that this means that God is ‘out there’ somewhere above and beyond and in humility comes ‘down here’ to humanity on planet Earth.  Others like St Francis see through their love of nature that God’s ‘footprints’ are everywhere in His creation.  It seems that the whole of God’s creation has a part of His DNA as it were.  You can see the likeness.  I quote from Fr Richard Rohr:

When God gives of God’s self, one of two things happens: either flesh is inspirited or spirit is enfleshed.  It is really very clear. I am somewhat amazed that more have not recognized this simple pattern: God’s will is incarnation.  And against all of our godly expectations, it appears that for God, matter really matters.  God, who is Spirit, chose to materialize!  We call it the Christ Mystery. Michael Angelo's 'Creation of Adam' This Creator of ours is patiently determined to put matter and spirit together, almost as if the one were not complete without the other.  This Lord of life seems to desire a perfect, but free, unification between body and soul.  So much so, in fact, that God appears to be willing to wait for the creatures to will and choose this unity for themselves - or it does not fully happen.  Our ‘yes’ really matters, just like Mary’s did. Adapted from Near Occasions of Grace, p. 5   In Genesis we learn that God created all things and He created humanity.  He breathed life into His creation – the Holy Spirit brooded over and breathed life into all things.  It has always been His desire to join together body and spirit – incarnation of Himself in humanity.  Sadly, we messed up and so in love, He sent His own Son to show us what He meant and make a way back for us.  Paul in his letter to the Romans says, “Do not tell yourself that you have to bring Christ down!” (10:6). And again I quote Fr Richard Rohr: He (Paul) knew that God had overcome the human-divine gap in the Christ Mystery. The issues of space and time have been overcome once and for all. God is here, not there.  The mystery of the Incarnation is precisely the repositioning of God in the material world once and forever. He is here!  All we have to do is accept and enjoy His presence. Happy Christmas!

 

Christmas Traditions -Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer

The story of Rudolph began in 1939, invented by a man called Robert L May.  At the time he was employed by a company called Montgomery Ward in Chicago.  For a number of years the company had purchased and distributed children's colouring books at Christmastime as gifts for their loyal customers.  In 1939,they asked Robert May to create a book for them in order to save money and so he wrote the story of Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer.  That year 2.4 million copies were handed out and despite hardship and a shortage of paper due to the war, over 6 million copies were distributed by 1946.

May got the idea for the story partly from the story of 'The Ugly Duckling' and partly from his own experience as he had often been taunted for his small, frail appearance as a youth and wanted to convey something of the feelings of someone who was thought of as a misfit in society.  He considered names like, Rollo and Reginald but finally decided on Rudolph for a name for the misfit reindeer.  The story was written in verse as a series of rhyming couplets.  As he went along he tested the story on his 4 year old daughter Barbara who loved it.




Sadly at the time of writing, his wife died and he was left with much debt because of medical bills but he was able to persuade the company president to give him the copyright in January 1947 so that his financial position was more secure.  The story was then printed commercially in 1947 and a 9 minute cartoon was produced in 1948.  This was shown in theatres.  May's brother-in-law wrote lyrics and a melody for the song 'Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer' and so the Rudolph phenomenon was born.  Some musical artists turned it down, worried that it would interfere with the legend of Santa Claus until Gene Autry's wife persuaded him to record it.  It sold 2 million copies that same year and went on to be one of the best-selling songs of all time, second only to 'White Christmas'.  Rudolph is now a much loved Christmas character.

 

Christmas Traditions - Santa Claus

I guess that most people know that the name of Santa Claus has evolved from Saint Nicholas so it is interesting to follow the history of the tradition from those very early days.  It begins in the 4th century when Saint Nicholas was the Greek Christian bishop of Myra in what is modern day Turkey.  He was known to be a very generous man, especially devoted to children.  One legend in particular tells of how he gave money to the three daughters of a very poor devout Christian so that they would each have a dowrie for their future instead of having to raise money by becoming prostitutes.  He died and was buried in Myra in 340 AD but it is alleged that Italian sailors stole his body and took it to Bari, Italy in 1087.  There the popularity of Saint Nicholas increased throughout Europe.  He became the patron saint of Russia.  In Greece he was the patron saint of sailors while the French thought of him as the patron saint of lawyers and of children and travellers in Belgium.  Around the 12th century the churches created an official holiday for the Feast of Saint Nicholas on the 6th December.  After the Reformation, his followers dwindled but the tradition was kept alive mainly by the Dutch who called him Sint Nikolaas that eventually became Sinterklaas.  It was when the Dutch took the tradition to America in the 17th century that the name Santa Claus emerged.

A vintage Coca Cola advert of the 1930s

In Britain, in the 17th century there was the tradition of Father Christmas.  Pictures of him survive from that era, portraying him as a jolly, well-nourished bearded man dressed in a long, green, fur-lined robe.  He typified the spirit of good cheer at Christmas.  This character and the gift-giver of church history merged into Santa Claus.  It is often thought that the first images of the modern day Santa Claus with his red and white clothes was due to the advertising of Coca Cola in the 1930s.  In fact, according to church history the patron saint of Russia, Saint Nicholas was portrayed with a red cloak and the first mention of Santa Claus was in the American press of 1773.  He had lost his bishop’s apparel, and was at first pictured as a thick-bellied Dutch sailor with a pipe in a green winter coat.  Santa Claus also  appeared dressed in red and white and essentially in his current form on several covers of Puck magazine in the first few years of the twentieth century before the Coca Cola adverts.  But I guess that the adverts in the 1930s did much to popularise the image we now have of Santa Claus.

I do feel that it's a shame that the original idea of Saint Nicholas and his generosity together with the whole Father Christmas idea of giving gifts and cheer has somewhat been overtaken in our materialistically orientated ways of the 21st century.  I always remember as a child and asking my mother whether Santa Claus existed or not and her reply was, 'I believe in the spirit of giving at Christmas'.  That, of course began with God's greatest gift on the very first Christmas.

Christmas Traditions - Christmas Cracker

The Christmas Cracker was devised in 1847 by an English confectioner and stationery manufacturer. He was on holiday in Paris with his family at the time.  English sweets were sold loose from trays but his children discovered that in Paris bon-bons were sugar-coated lollies that were wrapped in coloured paper and the ends twisted.  He thought that this gave them a novelty appearance as well as being more hygienic to handle.  He liked the idea so much that on his return to England he wrapped his lollies and sweets in similar paper and, unwittingly, began the development of his own 'bon-bons'.

 

The original Christmas Crackers were called Bon-Bons and were quite small with fairly plain wrapping.  Later said confectioner changed the wrapping to be a little more colourful and then added the friction strip - two small strips of cardboard coated with a small amount of explosive powder joining them together.  When the strips were pulled apart, the friction of the strips rubbing one against the other caused the bang that we still know today.  The friction snap was also known as "Silver Fulminante" - a discovery in 1802 by Dottore Luigi Valentino Brugnatelli (1761-1818) Professor of chemistry at Pavia University, Italy.  It was also the custom in Italy to have a little trinket inside a chocolate Easter Egg and the English confectioner would have been aware of this.

Returning from the family holiday in Paris, he pooled these ideas together and so the Christmas Cracker was born, complete with a surprise novelty, paper hat, a piece of paper with a joke or motto suitable for the occasion and, of course, the all-important snap to make a bang when pulled apart.  Originally all the contents were handmade and assembled by hand.  The outer wrapping would then be artistically decorated with a bow. 

The custom of decorating the table with a cracker on every place setting was established and handed down over generations.  Now this is seen not just in England but in other countries also.  Other manufacturers soon began to imitate the idea and with international distribution becoming easier the whole industry went into mass production continuing until the present day.

 

 

Christmas Traditions - Christmas plants

Over 200 years before Christ, Druids revered the mistletoe because although it has no roots, it remains green throughout the winter.  They often used it in their celebrations.  The ancient Celts believed it to have magical powers to heal and so they used it to combat poison, infertility and to ward off evil spirits.  It was also seen as a symbol of peace and the Romans said that if enemies met under some mistletoe, they would put down their weapons and embrace each other.  It was the Scandinavians, however, that appeared to introduce the custom of kissing under the mistletoe as they associated the plant with Frigga, their goddess of love and claimed that whoever kissed under the mistletoe was promised happiness and good luck in the following year.


In ancient times, it was generally believed that any plant that remained green throughout the cold winter months must have magical powers and so was often used in keeping evil spirits at bay.  It was believed that it was ghosts and demons that were whistling in the winter winds among the trees so holly was hung over the door in order to prevent the evil spirits from entering the home.  This would seem to be the precurser to the tradition of hanging a Christmas wreath of greenery on the door at christmastime.There was also a legend that claimed that holly sprang up in the footsteps of Jesus as he walked the earth, the points of the leaves representing the crown of thorns of his death and the berries his blood.  Greenery was also taken into the house in order to make the air a little fresher and to brighten the long dark days of winter.


Poinsettias were thought to have been used by 17th century Franciscan monks in Mexico during their Christmas celebrations.  One legend has it that a young Mexican boy was hurrying to attend a Nativity scene in the village but realised that he didn't have any gift to put in front of the manger.  So he quickly gathered together a few twigs of leaves and took them as his gift for the Christchild.  The other boys made fun of him but were surprised when in a short while the topmost green leaves turned bright red looking just like star-shaped flowers.  Joel R Poinsett was one time US ambassador to Mexico and the plant was named after him when he took the plant back to the US of A in 1828.

 

Christmas Traditions - The Christmas Tree

The tradition of the Christmas Tree is sometimes traced back to pre-Christan times when the symbolism of evergreen trees was part of ancient rites and ceremonies.  According to the Encyclopædia Britannica, "The use of evergreen trees, wreaths, and garlands to symbolize eternal life was a custom of the ancient Egyptians, Chinese, and Hebrews. Tree worship was common among the pagan Europeans and survived their conversion to Christianity in the Scandinavian customs of decorating the house and barn with evergreens at the New Year to scare away the devil and of setting up a tree for the birds during Christmas time." 

By the Middle Ages it was identified as the 'tree of Paradise' in a popular play about Adam and Eve.  The tree represented the Garden of Eden and it was decorated with apples to represent the 'forbidden fruit'.  This celebration also included the promise of a Saviour who would save the world from its sin and so it was often held during the advent season.



 
By the 18th century, it had become popular in most of Germany and was accepted as part of German culture.  It is thought that Martin Luther was responsible for introducing lights, inspired by his journey home one night when he was struck by the beauty of the stars twinking between the leaves of the fir trees he passed.  He decided to recreate the image on a small fir tree inside his house.



In Britian, it was known in the royal family in the early 19th century because of the union between George III and Queen Charlotte of Germany but it was Victoria's husband Prince Albert who made it popular and available to the masses throughout Britain.

Between now and Christmas it is my intention to look at other traditions connected with the festive season.
  

Victorian Christmas

Yesteday we had a most enjoyable day at Portsmouth's Victorian Christmas Market. Apart from the stalls, there were a number of entertainment events to get you in the mood. The first thing that we saw just after arriving through the gates was a demonstration of the Fort Cumberland Guard firing their muskets.

Shortly beyond that there was a kiosk selling warmed mince pie with mulled wine. For an extra 50 pence you could have the wine served in a souvenir mug which you could then take home. It seemed like a very appropriate way to start our Victorian experience!

Walking along it appeared to have started to snow until a few yards further we realised that it was a snow machine creating false snow in order to give an authentic Dickensian Christmas feel to the occasion. Throughout the market there were scenes of typical Victorian/Dickensian life.

There was also an exhibition of various old cycles - 2, 3 and 4 wheeled vehicles.



The original 'quadbike'?

As the market was held in the Historic Dockyard, there was opportunity to visit exhibits from earlier times in British maritime history - the Mary Rose museum.  The Mary Rose was a warship of the Tudor navy of Henry VIII. In 1545 it led the attack on a French invasion but sank in the Solent. It was raised from the sea bed in 1982. Also in the dockyard is HMS Victory, Admiral Lord Nelson's flagship that was used to defeat the French in the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805. I sense there was a bit of 'tongue in cheek' by the organisers of the Victorian Market as they put the French stalls right next to HMS Victory. Hmm!

We left the house just before 7.30 in the morning and arrived back about 7.45 in the evening, tired but happy to have experienced such an enjoyable day.

Preparations

The adverts are all trying to get us to part with our money and the shops entice us to buy their products.  The Christmas cards are beginning to arrive.  Every year the first one to arrive is from a 91 year old aunt who lives in Canada.  Yesterday I got the tree and decorations down from the loft ready for the weekend – I like to put the tree up and start putting the Christmas garlands and decorations around the living/dining rooms once December has arrived.  This Sunday Diego and I are having a day trip into Portsmouth to visit the Victorian Christmas Market there – looking forward to that!

 

A few years ago I bought a ‘Christmas’ cactus, so called because it flowers at Christmas time.  Except that most years mine flowers a bit before that.  And this year it has done just that.  It is now in full bloom.  I won’t complain because it is really pretty and this time of the year any colour from natural flowers or plants are welcome to cheer up the dull days.  But if I’m honest I would really like it to be in flower on Christmas Day.  When I see the buds appearing then I feel that it’s like another step in the preparations.  There are still quite a few buds that are still quite small and haven’t started to open up yet so maybe I’ll get my wish after all.

I’ve made lists and gradually ticking off the things that are now done.  Even though we don’t have small children in our home, I love Christmas and all it means to me as a Christian.  Why do people say it’s mainly for the children? - unless of course I’m still a kid at heart.

 

 

Omnirelevant

I have just invented a new word - omnirelevant.  The prefix omni- means all, ever, in all things and places.  We seem to use it more when we look for words to describe God - omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient.  I have considered God to be all of these things and also be always relevant to my life.  I have always maintained that God is not just the God of the Jews or the Old Testament or even the New Testament but God is relevant to all people and now.

I, along with most western Christians, was more than a little surprised at the result of the Anglican Synod yesterday when they voted not to have women bishops.  Most of the people there at the synod wanted the motion to be passed, the outgoing archbishop and the new archbishop both wanted it to be passed so what sort of 'democratic' voting system decrees that it will not happen, at least not now?

Yesterday I also received an email from a relative telling me of her son's marriage and saying she would send me the photos for me to see.  She mentioned that as her son was divorced and this was his second marriage, she felt that she could not share freely on Facebook as there are quite a number of her acquaintances who (for ‘religious’ reasons) don't agree with divorce or remarrying and so would cause problems and she asked me please not to share the photos.

I am amazed that in the 21st century western world (I'm referring here to people who consider themselves Christians, not some other religion) there are those who still have such a dinosaur mentality when it comes to their faith and how they practice it and expect others to practice it.  Outside the church construct people are hungry for God but is it any wonder that they want nothing to do with the organised church?  God is relevant - omnirelevant to us all but it would seem that the established, organised church construct no longer is.  People see the church as not relevant to them, their circumstances or the world we live in today.  

Not All That Bad

Two of my blogging friends have had a difficult time lately and both on their blogs this week have focussed not on their tragedies but on thanking God for what they do have and some of the happy times they have shared this year. At this time of year when our thoughts turn to Christmas preparations, I was thinking of what I should include in my usual newsletter that accompanies the cards I send in order to keep family and friends up to date with what is going on in our family. To be honest I am struggling to find enough things to say as this year has been VERY quiet; no travel, no holidays away, no life-changing situations. It seems that this past year I have been very boring and nothing of significance has happened.


But reading my friends' blogs I realised that my attitude was all wrong. Instead of bemoaning my uninteresting life I should think of the good times I have had and the daily blessings that I have enjoyed. Today the weather here in Yeovil has been lovely and warmer than recent days. So I was able to hang the washing outside and by mid afternoon it was all dry. There haven't been many days lately when the weather has been suitable to be able to do this. This morning I went to the hairdresser's to have my hair trimmed. Again I thanked God for the health and strength to be able to walk there and back. This time last year I was struggling to walk so far but God has indeed been good to me restoring my health.

Those who know me or who have followed my blog will know that I love to feed the wild birds in the winter. This week I was able to get a photo of a bluetit on the fat ball container. It is always a pleasure to see these beautiful little birds and that I am able to help in keeping them alive during the cold spell.

I could go on but won't, but I have learnt, or should I say have been reminded yet again, that even when things are not as we would like or seem quieter than we're used to, there is always something good. It's just that we can't see the good things when our minds our totally absorbed with the not so good.  It's just like the old song says, 'Count your many blessings, name them one by one ... ... and it will surprise you what the Lord has done.'

Visit and Changing Season

I realise it's 2 weeks since I posted anything on my blog. It was 2 weeks ago today that my elder sister and her husband came down from the northeast to visit us for a few days. They came on what we call 'the Christmas run' (as I mentioned in my last blog). They come with their presents for those of us living in the southwest and in return we give them the presents from us here to take back to those in the northeast. We look forward to this visit each year. As we are all getting older and finding travelling not quite so easy and a little more tiring than a few years ago, we try to make the most of the short time we have together. On the Sunday we all went to my younger sister's house for dinner and tea and she prepared a lovely 'Christmas' dinner with all the trimmings as we are never altogether at Christmas time. We spent a day out in Wells, looking around the cathedral. We always enjoy the visits to the two local garden centres to wander round their Christmas displays and have a coffee in the adjoining coffee shop. The displays are lovely to see but they remind me of those in the northeast and somehow don't quite equal those in the Metro Centre in Gateshead or the window displays in Fenwick's big department store in Newcastle. The child in me lives on especially at this time of year!

Sister Jean and brother-in-law Bernard with 2 younger members of the family,
 Charlie (left) and Oliver (right) on the Sunday get-together.

 

My sister and brother-in-law don't have a computer and as his brother and wife are currently enjoying a 6 week fabulous holiday touring around New Zealand and Australia, I was able to let them read the daily blog telling of their wonderful adventure and see the accompanying photos. I have recently been tracing our family tree back through the centuries, thanks to ancestry.co.uk and was able to share my findings with them. My brother-in-law had also brought documents and information to trace some of his family tree and they returned happy with the new-found knowledge of past relatives and where they had come from. Maybe now that they have had a little experience in using the computer and seeing how useful it is to browse the net, discovering useful information and keeping in touch with friends and family, who knows, maybe they might consider joining us in the 21st century.

My parents on their wedding day -
1st August 1931

While they were here, the weather wasn't too bad and things in the garden were still growing but in the past fortnight the gardener has made his last visit for this year, the trees are looking bare and there are few blackberries left to gather. The small fig tree now has its winter overcoat wrapped around it before the frosts come, British Summer time is no more, we have had the first fall of snow and morning frost on the grass and the evenings are dark sooner. This past two weeks have gone by quickly and thoughts are turning to Christmas preparations. Suddenly it seems that Christmas will soon be upon us and I need to start writing cards, especially those that need to be posted for family abroad so they get them in time. Time to make my endless lists of things to do and buy!