Holiday

This post is a little later than usual as this past week my son Diego and I have been away on the Isle of Wight.  We got back after 9 pm last night because of a delay on the ferry crossing.  This morning has been about sorting out cases, washing and shopping for those fresh essentials that don't go in the fridge or freezer.

We have never been to the Isle of Wight before and I have often thought about going but never made it until now.  We had a lovely few days being driven around by our very helpful and good-natured South West Coaches driver.  Now I no longer drive we look for alternative ways to have days out and holidays and found the coach company very good.  It's nice for someone else to do the driving.  It means that I can enjoy the passing countryside as well as being less tired and stressed by traffic.  

I took a few ebooks with me with the intention of spending some time reading and thinking but that didn't happen.  Instead I enjoyed the conversation of people I hadn't met before and was able to soak up all the new experiences and what was going on around me.  We visited some very interesting places and saw some historic sites and some new innovations .  I didn't go looking for some deep meaning or mini-sermon in situations.  God is everywhere but we don't need to go looking for some spiritual lesson.  I worshipped and sensed God's presence just by simply enjoying the things I saw and living fully in the moment of what was happening.  

So this week I just want to share some photos from those few days away.

Osborne House - the summer retreat of royalty

excellent indoor show of fountains 'dancing' to music

The model village - this is where we had a drink in the real Griffin Hotel
but discovered it was the most expensive in the town!

the model village at Godshill

the model village

Diego in the model village

in the botanical gardens

in the botanical gardens

in the botanical gardens

me beside the fountain in the botanical gardens

the steam train that took us on an hour's journey along the country track 

Shanklin old town

Shanklin old town

tea rooms in Shanklin old town where we had a very nice cream tea
with apple and ginger scones - very yummie!

Roots

This week has seen the return of a TV programme that I really enjoy watching - 'Who Do You Think You Are?  For those who don't know, it traces the ancestry of celebrities and uncovers some very interesting and sometimes unusual and hitherto unknown facts.  There are always surprises and often tears as the stories unfold about their forbears.  Sometimes the celebrities begin to understand just why they are, feel and do as they do as they clarify some mystery from the past.  A couple of years ago I decided to trace my ancestors on both sides of the family, right back to the 1700s.  I remember as a child that two of my uncles had a shoe repair shop in our local town and I used to love to go and watch them mend the shoes and breathe in the smell of fresh leather.  I was told that the shop originally belonged to my paternal grandfather but looking further into the family history I discovered that there had been bootmakers in the family since the early 1800s, the business having been handed down from father to son over several generations.  The roots of the shoemaking business lay way back in the roots of our family history.

When I am weeding in the garden, I prefer to dig the weeds up by the roots in order to get rid of them instead of spraying them with chemicals all the time.  Occasionally though that is not so easy, on the paths and the front drive where you can't really dig them up.  The alternative is to get some weedkiller and spray them and let the chemicals do their work.  The best ones of course are the ones that you spray on the leaves of the weed and the chemicals go to work reaching right down to the roots underneath the ground.  Otherwise the weed seems to die but then comes back again as the roots go on feeding the plant.  To be effective, you have to get to the roots.

A close relative of mine has recently been in hospital and undergone quite a big operation.  She had been in a great deal of pain for a long time, months becoming years.  She has taken pain relief to relieve the symptoms until eventually the pain was becoming so bad she was sent to see a specialist at the hospital.  Various tests and scans were done in order to look deeper and ascertain the real cause of the problem.  Eventually the day came and she went to the hospital, a bit nervous but really having reached the point of just wanting the pain to go away.  After a time of recuperation she is now well on the mend but more importantly is without the constant pain that she had to put up with for so long before.  Once the specialist was able to get to the root of her problem, then the situation could be dealt with effectively.

The trouble I find in life is that too often we concentrate all our efforts on the symptoms that a problem produces.  A few decades ago, people weren't so eager to visit a psychiatrist or counselor to talk through problems in case they were thought by others to be a little deranged.  In fact such professionals were sometimes considered a bit suspect and often referred to in a rather derisory way as 'shrinks'.  Nowadays we understand that they saw the importance of going back in order to dig deep and find the root cause of a problem.  This often turned out to be not a physical problem at all but some hurt, fear or sense of inadequacy or exclusion or maybe loneliness, things that are hidden so deeply inside that others are not aware of itheir existence.  We think that we are sorting out a problem when the real problem is something quite different, hidden and not obvious until we delve deeper.

I feel that so many problems in the world, on both an individual and group level, whether that be family, friends, tribes or nations, could be solved if only we really addressed the root of the problem.  We waste so much time and effort treating and reacting to the symptoms when the real problem is still there often festering underneath so that the problem we think we have dealt with crops up again and again.  So often we ask the wrong questions!  There is no point in doctoring and treating the hurt and pain if we don't deal with the root cause of that pain and hurt.  Jesus knew that very well when he told the crippled man that his sins were forgiven.  He then told him to get and walk.  He knew that the man was concerned that his physical limitations were because of some sin.  He needed to know that God had dealt with that problem.  People are hurting and in pain and we waste time on superficial symptoms instead of really dealing with their root point of need and giving them the help they're silently crying out for.  Let's not waste time looking at the outside, the symptoms, the appearance of a situation but go to the roots and see where the help is really needed.
  

Tunnel Vision

I've been thinking all this week about tunnels.  Not sure why unless it's because they have been mentioned on the news.  But I've been thinking about them not in the sense that the news has been referring to them - as somewhere to hide people and ammunition.  I have been thinking more of tunnels we encounter on journeys and what they symbolize.  Yesterday I read a blog that talked about a woman who referred to her recurring depression as a tunnel.  She felt that it was like being in a dark tunnel and she couldn't see the way out of it until she decided to go to a counselor.  The dark tunnel of depression is something that many people struggle to cope with in their lives.


But my mind was more on the idea of tunnel vision.  It is a perfect description of that particular sight problem.  People can only see what is in front of them while all around is unclear and a bit blurred.  They are unable to see to the sides and need to turn their heads to bring something at the side into their line of sight.  I remember as a child travelling on a train through a tunnel and straining to see the light at the end of it, knowing that that small dot of white so far away was the point we were heading towards and then we would be able to see everything clearly again.  While you're in the tunnel, you cannot see what's outside of it.  Your vision in limited.  All you can see is the light straight ahead.  You are unable to see anything on either side so as far as you are concerned, straight ahead is the only possible way - it's all you can see.


Once you're out of the tunnel you become aware that there is a whole big world going on outside the tunnel.  Other people are also travelling in the same direction but by roads that run alongside the railway track.  You might think that your way is quicker and more sure but you miss a lot of what is going on around because your vision is totally centred on the light at the end of the tunnel.  I have said this before but it's what has been nagging in my head all week - we need to accept that there is more than one way to travel.  Ours is NOT the only mode of transport in life's journey.  Many are headed in the same direction with the same ultimate goal in mind but choose to travel a different way having varying encounters on the way.  That doesn't mean they won't get there.  It just means that they're not sharing our carriage with us just as others may choose not to share their road vehicle.  Just because in the tunnel, looking straight ahead they cannot be seen on the adjacent road, that doesn't mean they don't exist and that they're not travelling to the same destination.

We have always maintained that our way is the right way and therefore the only way.  God is the destination but he is also everywhere and in all things.  Whichever way we travel in life, let's not be affected by tunnel vision thinking that what we see is the only way.  It isn't!  This may seem contradictory to all that we may have thought or believed.  I like to think of it not so much as a contradiction but rather a paradox or as Richard Rohr puts it: 

Paradox is the ability to live with contradictions without making them mutually exclusive, realizing they can be both/and instead of either/or.

Bee Yourself

You can just about see the tiny white flowers near the top of the bush.

I spent some time the other day trying to trim back and tidy up some overgrown bushes at the bottom of the garden that had become a sort of mini forest.  It's a part of the garden that is mainly to make a natural barrier between our garden and the garden of the neighbours at the back of us.  So I like it to grow big and quite thick but it still needs the occasional 'haircut'.  While I was cutting away I noticed one bush had some tiny white flowers that I had never really noticed before.  They were so small that it is difficult to actually see them among all the foliage.  I couldn't help thinking that if that were a human they would possibly reason that hardly anyone ever goes to that part of the garden in the far corner at the back so why bother.  No-one would notice if it produced any flowers or not so what's the point?  But being a plant, it does just what it's designed to do.  Producing small flowers was something it just did in the annual cycle of life and it didn't depend on being noticed or appreciated.  It flowered anyway!

Taken from the BBC Springwatch Facebook page, 20th July 2014

We have heard much lately about the bees and how we need to look after them.  They are considered to be the most important pollinators of food crops.  It is thought that a third of the food we consume each day depends on pollination mainly by bees.  The inset picture shows some very interesting stats about bees and what they do.  We are encouraged to have a bee-friendly garden by planting the plants that will attract bees.  Local councils are encouraged to leave spare ground as wild meadows for bee-loving flowers to grow in the wild.  I was very interested to learn that bees don't actually go so much for the exotic types of flowers but are more drawn to the ordinary British flowers including most of the wild flowers.  It's really quite mind blowing to think that so much depends on such a small creature.  It doesn't have the size of an elephant, the fierce roar of a lion or the strength of a grizzly bear to make an impression.  It's so small that it flies from flower to flower without many noticing it at all.


The Bible verse comes to mind about how God uses the weak to confound the mighty and the well known story of the shepherd boy David defeating the giant Goliath.  The thing is that so often we look for success in size and strength.  You are taught from childhood that you have to climb the ladder of success at work.  People try to impress others by saying that their relative or close friend has such and such a position at work or a certain car or large house.  Some love to show off their suntan to give the impression (rightly or wrongly) that they have travelled to some far off land (implying a certain wealth?)  In many walks of life (even church life) there can be a sort of competition for popularity and trying to be more active and involved than someone else.  Some people spend their lives comparing themselves with others and aiming to copy them or be like them.  It gets to the point that often people can feel a bit of a failure for just being ordinary, with no particular talent to share.  They have a rather apologetic attitude and are always striving after some false goal to achieve in order to 'make something' of themselves.  Yet throughout the Bible and in creation God shows time and again how he loves the ordinary.  


The flower at the bottom of the garden just did what is was supposed to do.  The bee just gathers pollen and nectar to keep his extended family fed and surviving every day.  It doesn't know how important it is in the big scheme of things - it just does what it is meant to do each and every ordinary day.  And that is all that God asks of us.  He just wants me to be me.  He made me me because that was his plan and that is my purpose - just to be me.  If that entails just doing the ordinary, everyday things then that is what I should do.  Who knows in the big scheme of things what that might mean or lead to.  I might never know but that shouldn't stop me from being who God made me to be.  Even if you think you don't make a difference or nobody notices, like the tiny white flower, do it anyway.  No competing or comparing with others.  Just bee yourself!   

Talking My Language

This week I have watched a couple of absolutely fascinating programmes about 'talking to the animals'.  Through modern technology we are now able to decipher many of the noises made by animals.  Researchers have discovered that what they thought were simple grunts and shouts of (possibly) fear at the approach of some danger, are actual sounds relating to particular situations and the sounds change depending on the form of danger or situation - they are actual words in animalspeak.  Some creatures are even 'bilingual', understanding the particular sounds made by an entirely different species.  Other creatures that were thought to make no sound at all but only gestures have been found to use sounds that the human ear cannot hear.  I won't bore you with all the details of all the discoveries (if you missed it and are interested, you can catch up on BBCiPlayer) but I will mention the amazing Honey Guide bird that has conversations with the people of the Masai Mara.  The bird knows the exact spot of the bee hive but can't retrieve the honey because of all the bees - their stings would prove fatal for such a small bird - but it knows that the men of the Masai Mara have ways of getting to the honeycomb.  The bird communicates with the tribesmen with a particular call that is used only for the purpose of contacting humans.  The men call back with the same call and follow the bird until it leads them to the hive.  They get the honeycomb which they then share with the bird by way of a 'thank you'.  Amazing!  We talk about 'dumb animals' but it seems that the ones who have been dumb are us humans in believing that they can't and don't communicate with other creatures within their own species and with those of other species.

We can look at some people and judge them to be a bit OTT and noisy when they might actually be hiding behind a front to disguise the deep loneliness that is their reality.  Someone who can appear stand-offish and keeping themselves at a distance might really be afraid of getting too close to someone.  They may have been hurt too many times in the past and now don't trust either their own judgment or the words of anyone else.  They just don't want to go through the experience of being judged or misunderstood yet again so they prefer not to mix too much.  If someone is a bit grumpy, they might not be bad tempered but be feeling taken for granted and unappreciated when all they want to do is strive to please those around them.  So taking a tip from the research into animal speak, maybe we should listen carefully to the sounds instead of judging too quickly.  Why are they the way they are?  Why do they say the things they say?  What do the sounds and actions really mean?

When we say that someone is talking our language, what we mean is that they understand where we're coming from.  They not only hear the sound of our words but know exactly what we mean.  We feel that they can relate to us in a way that goes deeper than sound.  Befriending in this way takes time and effort.  The programmes took 2 hours to share with the general public but the actual research has taken years.  An article can be read in a few minutes or a sermon can be preached in half an hour (some more, some less) but really getting to know and understand a person's deep longings and needs takes much longer.  It takes observation, continuous contact and a willingness to really listen, not just to the words that are spoken but also to what is not said.  People are often silently crying out in their pain, loneliness and unhappiness but how often we just hear words but don't understand their language.  They are in need for someone to talk their language, know what makes them tick and understand what they are really communicating.  

This is not done through big gatherings but on one-to-one.  It is possible to talk to a load of people all at the same time but really getting to know them and what they are saying is a different ballgame.  You can sit in the garden or the park and listen to all the bird songs but identifying each individual bird and knowing what each separate call signifies is completely different.  It is comforting, refreshingly reassuring and in a sense liberating when someone knows exactly what you mean, when they talk your language.  Listening and not just hearing, seeking to understand instead of dismissing out of hand, that's the key to learning another language.  I pray for a world full of linguists. 

Live Now

This week my nephew shared on Facebook a photo of his 4 year old son, Oliver looking very smart and all grown-up in his new school uniform ready for when he starts school in September.  Time seems to have just whizzed by since he was born.  I remember holding him when he was only a few days old.  He was so tiny and fragile and now suddenly he's off to school!  His first tooth, his first step, his first word are all now just memories.  He now chats away and absorbs new information all the time.  He seems to know things about how things work and which button to press, things that take me a while to assimilate.  On seeing his photo, many memories came back of my own children also and how each precious moment soon becomes a memory.  It was a sharp reminder for me to cherish the present and live now to the full. 



Of course not all memories are so pleasurable.  Some leave scars and hurt but all are incorporated and woven into the tapestry of our lives and go to make us the people we now are today.  I wouldn't be the person I now am if I hadn't had the rough as well as the smooth.  But all experiences good or not so good can leave us some worthwhile lesson.  You never really learn patience if you've never had to wait for anything.  You don't learn about hope until you feel down.  Having to live without something helps us to learn the real value and appreciate what we do have.  Remembering the past is not really the problem.  The real problem is when we keep dragging the past into the present.  What has gone cannot be changed.  It has contributed to who we are today so be thankful for it and let it go.  All we have is the now.  That is why we need to enjoy the now to the full because it will soon become another memory. 


There are those who are always hankering after some future excitement or big thing.  They spend time (and often a lot of money) going from one big conference or gathering to another and totally miss the point that God is right where we are, here and now.  We don't need to go looking for him, hoping that if we can get to that big meeting, He'll show up and bless us.  We are the temple of God and He resides in us.  Where we are, He is.  Not everyone can write like J K Rowling or J R R Tolkien.  Only a few people have actually reached the moon.  It would be a dysfunctional business if all the staff were managing directors.  Who would actually make the goods or clean the premises?  It is good to have dreams and ambitions but some miss so much because their minds are on something else, always striving.  Wherever we are and whatever we do in life, God is in us and shows Himself to others through us.  Theodore Roosevelt gave some very sound advice when he said, 'Do what you can with what you have where you are'.

Today is a gift - use it and fill it so that  tomorrow you will have beautiful memories.  Look around you whatever your circumstances and find something to make you smile.  Our children may be grown and left home already, or maybe you don't have any.  You can still fill your today in such a way that in the future you can look back and smile.  God's will is for us to live life to the full.  Here's to a future full of happy memories.

What If ... ... ?

What if... ... ?  This is a question often asked in the UK when trying to arrange some outing or inviting friends to a BBQ in the summer - what if it rains?  We always feel the need to make some other arrangements just in case the weather is not on our side that particular day.  It's not just the weather of course that involves thinking of contingency plans in the event that our ideas and organising skills don't go to plan.


Because of the winter storms and the problem with the tiles on the roof of our house and the subsequent leak (as mentioned in previous posts) we have had to deal with a little problem of damp in one of the bedrooms.  It was only one wall that was affected and so we really decided that a couple of tester pots of paint of the same colour would work out cheaper than buying a larger pot.  I really didn't want to have to buy a 5 litre pot of paint to paint just one small wall.  It was a well known brand and so we thought that we would be able to get it easily.  We did raise the question 'What if ...   we can't get a matching colour?  What will we do?'  We carefully considered alternatives - that wall could become a feature wall of a contrasting colour or we could just paint all of the bedroom walls a different colour.  As it turned out it wasn't that easy but eventually we did manage to get what we were looking for, after trying a few DIY stores. So the wall has been restored to its former condition.

This week I read an article about someone who had been part of the set up at Mars Hill mega-church based in Seattle.  The church now has 14,000 members in 15 locations in 5 states.  The article quoted something Mark Driscoll, one of the co-founders of the church, said.

Mark Driscoll

'What if the church (referring to Mars Hill church) stopped growing?  What if we shrunk?  What if everything fell apart?  What if half the staff left?  Would I still worship Jesus or would I be a total despairing mess?'

I am not interested in discussing mega-churches or anything about Mark Driscoll.  Some like him and his books and some don't but I kept thinking about this quote.  What if ......?  


Many cannot understand people like me who no longer participate in any organised form of church yet still claim to be just as sincere in their faith and commitment to God.  Once you really get hold of the truth that God really is everywhere, that the Holy Spirit dwells within us and that the Kingdom is here with us now, then there really is no problem.  Last year, after two and a half years of being unemployed my son (who shares the house with me) got a job where his working hours include every weekend - Friday, Saturday and Sunday.  So our weekend is now on a Monday and Tuesday.  On Tuesday we have a full roast dinner, sit together to eat, watch a DVD together and chat, often about spiritual things.  Our time together on our 'Sunday' is possibly more relaxed than for many who attend some place of worship.  We spend real time together, chilling and chatting - our day of rest. 



The danger lies when people think that the organised church way of doing things is the only way and that without it they would be lost.  What if ... ... ? illness meant that you could no longer go to the building? you had no means of getting there? (here in Yeovil there are no buses on a Sunday and not everyone has their own transport) you had a job where working on a Sunday was a requirement?  or many more 'what if?' situations you might think of.  Like Mark Driscoll asks - would you still worship or would you be a despairing mess?  The organised church for many is a very helpful means of connecting with God and others but there is the danger that the means actually becomes the end in itself.  And then the worship is not so much about God but about the system, the means that we use to connect with Him.  Jesus would meet people in their homes or in the countryside all the time more than in the synagogue on the Sabbath.  He would talk to anyone and everyone regardless or status, gender, nationality or work and not just Jews who conformed to religious rules and expectations.  His friends were from many varied walks of life, different personalities.  How many Christians have close friendships with people who are not within the church set up?  He worshipped his Father in the everyday things, using them as illustrations in his conversations about God and Kingdom things.  He showed us how to worship God and not the system.  What if ... ... for whatever reason we were denied the church system as we know it today, what if .. ... the whole system crumbled, would we still be Christians?  Would we still make time for God, connect with Him and follow His ways?  What if ... ... we understood that God still exists outside of the system and that He's just as real and loving and wanting a relationship with us?  What if ... ... once again He ripped the 'curtain of the temple' and chose to show Himself outside of the confines of the religious building?  Who would follow Him?  We must not replace God with the religious system, however helpful it may be - it is not the be all and end all of things.  The system is not God, only a means to God, only one path of many.
  

OT Christians or Jesus People

There is a cartoon that I follow on Facebook called 'Coffee with Jesus'.  A few days ago they published the following cartoon and it set me thinking.  What does 'Jesus people' really mean?

We consider Jesus People and Christians to be synonymous but I have come to the conclusion that there are many things about Christianity as people think of it today that are not in accord with the things that Jesus said and did.  They don't follow his way of doing things and understanding as to what the gospel message is.

There are so many rules and regulations about what we should or shouldn't do, think or believe.  Our thinking and standards are so often based on Old Testament law.  Many times (I don't really know how many as I haven't actually counted but I'm sure someone, somewhere has) Jesus says about the law 'Moses said but I say to you ... ... '  He was known for breaking the law as written in their Scriptures - he healed on the Sabbath, he and the disciples walking in the fields and plucking and rubbing ears of corn to eat were actually working on the Sabbath, he spoke to a stranger, a woman and a Samaritan woman at that (sworn enemy of Jews), he even made a Samaritan the hero of one of his stories.  Sticking to the letter of the law might have been very commendable to a Pharisee but Jesus didn't seem to have anything in common with the Pharisees and showed that people and how they felt were far more important.   

The Old Testament shows how women have second place and on the whole Scripture is written from the male point of view.  Jesus crossed that barrier and spoke to women treating them as equal to men.  He accepted women among his followers and gave the first preaching assignment after his resurrection to a woman - 'Go tell the disciples and Peter ...'   Many Christians today still do not accept the place of women as equal basing their ideas and thinking in the Old Testament saying that Scripture says that women shall serve men.  Looking at it a bit closer we realise that this was as a result of the Fall and was not God's original intention or plan for women.  He made man and woman to be equal partners.  If the coming of Jesus was a means to put things right again between man and God, then women are not the lesser of the species , neither inferior nor subservient to the men.  The Jesus way restores women to their rightful place as equals in all aspects of life - home, work, relationship as well as religion.  All are equal in the eyes of God.

When Jesus began his ministry, he read from the book of Isaiah saying that his ministry was in order to preach good news to the poor, set the prisoners free, help the blind to see and release the oppressed.  (Isaiah 61:1,2)  In other words his gospel was not about comfortable middle class resting and enjoying life.  It was about helping those living in the margins of life, struggling to survive and bringing hope to those who seemed to have none.  Many Christians today rest on their laurels if they go to a place of worship regularly, give in the offering and generally try to live a good life, (especially if they don't swear, drink or smoke).  It's not about keeping spiritually comfortable and safe while waiting for pie in the sky when we die.  The gospel message Jesus told us to declare is not about 'in-house' mutual backslapping and a Sunday morning feel-good factor of (sometimes quite smug) self satisfaction.  It's for those who don't fit in, those 'untouchables' that Jesus had time and compassion for, the mixed-up and lonely, the poor and hungry, to bring back hope where it has been lost, to lift up those who don't see a way out of their despair, to hug the unlovable. 

I won't make this post too long so I'll mention just a couple more very quickly and leave readers to ponder more about them.  There are those who take pride in religious buildings - for some the bigger and more ornate the better it would seem.  Jesus walked the countryside considering the lilies of the field that God had made so beautiful, praising God for knowing when even the most inconspicuous bird fell out of the sky.  God's first idea after Eden was a tent that travels wherever people travel - it/He is always with us.  His stories were taken from everyday life that everyone could relate to.  Another consideration is that no-one paid Jesus or his disciples for doing what they did.  Even Paul on his long missionary journeys worked at making tents to help pay his way.  And I say this as one who has in the past received payment for leadership within the religious set-up.  I wonder how many missionary journeys would happen if everyone paid their own way and were not paid to be a special speaker at some event!?

Just a few rambling thoughts on being what I would call Old Testament Christians or Jesus People.  I'll leave you to decide where you are.  But be honest with yourself and God!  Me? - I like and relate to the words of Jim Palmer:

Theory and Practice

There are some theories that are always constant in practice.  My mind goes back to school day Maths and Pythagoras - 'the square  of the hypotenuse of a right angled triangle is equal to the sum of the squares of the other two sides' is the one that springs immediately to mind.  There are other theories about the sum of angles in a triangle or square or the many Algebraic formulas that I have long since forgotten since I stopped needing to use them.  To balance out our thoughts of maths with the arts, in music a semibreve is always worth two minims and there are always four semiquavers to a crotchet.  And so we could go on citing theories that will always give the same results.

   

The particular timetable in question

There are however many occasions when the theory doesn't always correspond to the working out in practice.  Last week I visited a friend's house and had worked out the time of my bus to get me back to the centre of town.  Those living in larger towns and cities need to realise that here in the country towns of the south west the bus service is not so frequent.  They are often less frequent than one an hour and the last bus I could get from my friend's house back into town was at 4.30 in the afternoon.  I left in good time, or so I thought but after having stood at the bus stop for about 20 minutes I realised that it had been earlier than scheduled and decided I'd better set out and walk the 35 minutes in to the centre of town to get the bus that would take me home.  Fortunately the last bus from town to my home was around 6.30 pm.   I'm sure that those who depend on public transport will have at some time faced the problem of the theory of timetables not matching up to their working out in practice!  In fact it is so hitty missy that you need to take that into account when planning a journey.

I remember when I first went to live in Argentina.  I had been married to my Argentinian husband for only 6 months and was so keen to make a good impression when meeting his family for the first time.  I had read books and done all the exercises to learn the Spanish language. I had learnt the rules of grammar and correct pronunciation (or so I thought).  I was all ready - in theory.  That is until I arrived and couldn't understand a word anyone said!   To complicate things a bit I was often told that what I said was Spanish but in South America some words and pronunciation were a little different.  The theory was all in my head.  I knew how to conjugate the verbs correctly and make the adjectives agree with the nouns whether they were masculine or feminine, singular or plural but the theory on its own was not enough.  I lacked the practice.  Anyone who has studied languages at school will appreciate the difference between learning a language for a written exam and actually having to speak to an examiner in the oral exam. 

There are many who know the theory (or theology) of their religion but somehow the practice of it doesn't seem to match up.  There really is no point in being able to quote chapter and verse unless we actually put it into practice.  People feel the need to keep reading and learning and explaining the theory and when we understand the explanation we feel that now we've got it.  But actually it's the working out in the practicalities of daily living that matters.  It's no use knowing the bus timetable by heart when the bus doesn't stick to the timetable.  It's no use knowing how to conjugate a verb correctly if we don't pronounce it right.  And it's no use knowing the sacred text inside out if our living doesn't match up to what we read and learn in theory.  The theory is ok but no use without the working out in practice.  Or as the New Testament book of James puts it - faith without works is dead!  

Mixed Feelings - That's Ok

Contrasting thoughts, the ups and downs of life, you win some you lose some, disappointment and happiness, painful wounds and joyful celebration, feelings that most people have much of the time.  This week we have been very happily eating the strawberry crop from our garden which this year is abundant.  Some things I planted have progressed well while others have not.  The potatoes and tomatoes are doing great, some carrots are growing while others - nothing!.  The peas and peppers have been quite badly eaten by something - snails and ants probably, despite putting out preventative measures.  I was wondering why it is that snails and ants never seem to go for the weeds in the garden but always enjoy devouring things that I have planted and which we hoped to eat ourselves.  They say that thrushes and blackbirds eat snails so I thought maybe I should put up a notice in bird language, 'Free snail feast here! Chirp, chirp'.  I know, I know, all are God's creatures and all that but quite honestly I don't feel the same towards the snails that eat my plants as I do towards the bees that pollinate them.  Selfish of me I know.  Mixed feelings - disappointment and happiness. 

This afternoon I am going to a wedding.  It's more than seven years now since my friend separated and finally divorced from her husband.  My mind went back to those days of trauma and upset.  He moved out and she kept the house so she said that in all fairness he could take what he wanted.  I had said that for that first weekend when he left, I would stay over with her so she wouldn't be alone.  That first night we slept on the floor - he had taken the bed!  Earlier that evening we had gone to the local chippy for comfort food and we sat there for some time in the restaurant part of the shop. We went there as it was just something we didn't have to make ourselves or clear up afterwards.  She talked and I listened.  We did that quite a lot, her talking and me listening.  But today she is getting married again - a very nice man, loving and caring.  Actually they had a quiet wedding at the registry office earlier in the year and wanted to invite their friends to their home for a blessing and a time of sharing together now the better weather is here.  Mixed feelings - painful wounds and joyful celebration.



You may say, that's life, and so it is.  What really bugs me though is when so-called well-meaning individuals come out with things like, 'All things work together for good to those who love God', 'Time is a great healer', It'll seem altogether different in the morning'.  These words are probably all true but ... ... the thing is that when you are actually going through some disappointment or trauma the last thing you want is for someone to come out with something like that.  Actually what you really feel like doing is shouting at them 'Just shut up!  Life sucks and I feel like crap!'  Oh my goodness, you can't say that!  But if we're really honest that's what we would like to say.  If you sometimes feel like that, don't worry.  You're in good company.  The good news is that we can get angry with God and He takes it.  If you're not sure about that then read the Psalms.  They are full of people who blurt out their anger at God.  The writer of Ecclesiastes says 'So I hated life ... ... All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.'  Hey, even Jesus at his crucifixion felt abandoned by God and shouted out questioning why God had left him to die alone.

Life is a bundle of mixed feelings and that's ok.  It's the same for everyone and if anyone tries to say differently I for one would take what they say with a pinch of salt.  They may smile (rather condescendingly) and quietly say , 'Don't worry'  or offer some other unhelpful advice but that doesn't really help.  If anyone is hurting you don't have to find an answer to their problems. Just walk with them for a while so they're not on their own.  God can take it and He will sort it in His own way and time.  Here's to life - with all its ups and downs.

New Wings

I have recently purchased a Kindle Fire HD.  The reasoning behind it is that when I go away anywhere I can carry it with me .  That way I won't need to carry the weight of books while at the same time I can still connect with friends on Facebook and blogs and check my emails.  It cannot do everything my home computer can but it is enough for what I want while not at home.  I have never had a laptop so I'm just now learning to use my index finger instead of a mouse to control what I want to do and see.  I feel a bit like ET or that strange animal called the Aye Aye with a long pointy finger!  

The thing is that I'm not one for hankering after the latest gadget or 'in' thing.  Actually things as such don't really impress me. But sometimes I have to admit that I can't do what I would like to with an older piece of equipment and so I invest in something new that will deliver.  I am not going to do away with something just because it's old.  If it still works then why not go on using it?  But there are times that a new way or a new direction is needed.  The old isn't enough any more.  Sometimes we need to get something different that is more adequate for our present needs.

On a completely different note, one of my favourite wildlife specialists is Simon King.  I follow him on Facebook and YouTube.  He lives in Somerset and has quite a few acres of land with his home called Wild Meadows where he studies, cares for and photographs the local wildlife.  He has, over the past few weeks, had various cameras in a number of different nests.  The wren chicks were the first to fledge and then the blue tits.  The kestrel is still brooding her three eggs that are about to hatch any day now.  This week all interest was on the jackdaw nest.  There were two chicks that were fast outgrowing the space that the parents had made for them.  The day they finally fledged (Thursday) they kept going near to the entrance of the nest box and chirping, then going back and settling down again.  You could hear the parents calling from outside the nest and occasionally they entered the nest and chirped.  You could almost hear them telling their children to get up and go outside.  They ventured out a little way and then back to the nest.  They did this a few times and then finally left for good.

Their lives will never be the same again.  They no longer have that comfort zone where they can go to and just settle down and wait to be handed their food and be kept warm and out of danger of enemies that would attack them.  They now have to use their wings, something they haven't really done before.  Their wings would no longer be just to snuggle down in the nest but for flying freely over the countryside.  Eventually they will need to learn to get their own food - no more ready meals regurgitated  from parents.  They will have to learn to trust their own instinct and decisions.  It reminded me of Paul (in the Bible) when he complained that some followers of Jesus were just like small children and not willing to grow up.  We are part of God's creation and that is how He has ordained creation to be.  In our Christian lives we need to fledge the nest, trust our own decisions and the spirit that God has placed in each of us, use our wings to fly by ourselves and look for food and not keep going back to the comfort of dependent spiritual living, waiting for others to feed us and keep us out of danger.  When our needs are no longer met by the old system, then we need to look at doing things in a new way, start using our wings and fly freely.  Like the rest of creation, you don't know what you're missing til you try it.  

A Day Out

This week my son Diego and I had a day out with South West Coaches.  We spent the morning at a centre called World of Country Life and the afternoon in Exmouth.  It was a good day and the rain kept away although it did rain in other parts of the southwest as some of the roads coming home were a little flooded - as if the winter storms hadn't been enough!  Everyone is given allocated seats when you book and ours was right in the front of the bus.  Behind us sat two ladies in their 40s who had very loud voices so loud my son and I couldn't have a conversation with each other as we couldn't hear ourselves above them.  As we got off the bus we realised that one of them was with her parents and had a few learning difficulties and lacked some social skills.  Just past the reception area of the centre there is a sort of museum with loads of exhibits portraying 19th and early 20th century life in rural Britain.  Diego made a joke and so the young woman, mentioned above, stated that he was her tour guide and comedian!  She sort of tagged along hanging on every word, waiting for another joke.  A little later we did go our separate ways before the situation became too tiresome - for us that is.  The young woman was having a brilliant time and thoroughly enjoying every minute.


Part of the centre had an exhibition of birds of prey that we enjoyed very much.  Knowing that the birds are really really captive and kept in enclosures, it was good to see the ones in the exhibition enjoying flying freely around, although they always came back for food and eventually back to their enclosure.  It reminded me of a picture I saw some days ago with an empty bird cage.  The wording says 'This is not an empty cage, it is a bird that is FREE.'  I can't help thinking that whoever had originally had the bird in the cage would be thinking more of their loss than the fact that the bird was free to fly.


The afternoon we spent in Exmouth.  After a pub meal right on the coast we sat on some seats on the promenade and just watched the world go by.  Ah, so relaxing. It wasn't too hot to be uncomfortable nor did it rain to make it miserable - just right.  Then it was on the coach again for the return journey.  This time the loud conversation from the two in the seats behind us somehow didn't seem so intrusive or annoying.  Maybe it was because it wasn't so unexpected.  They had enjoyed their day out and that was good.  Everyone had had a good day.

It seems that in much of life there are two sides to a situation.  We naturally think of things from our own point of view and how it affects us personally.  There is nothing wrong in that.  We were beginning to be a little irritated with the young lady while from her point of view she was enjoying our company.  It was good the see the birds flying freely but this could only happen because there are centres that cater for such exhibitions and keep the birds in enclosures.  So I was left with a reminder that not everyone thinks or feels the same as me.  Others have the same legitimate right to have their opinion and way of doing things and it's helpful if I can accept that and respect them for who they are.  We are all coming from different points of reference and so see things differently.  There are different ways of looking at the same thing.  There are other points of view that are different from my own but equally valid.  It was a good reminder that a different way of seeing/doing/interpreting something is not necessarily wrong, just different.  And often we can learn something new by looking at things from a different point of view.

Pointing To The Moon

A couple of thoughts have been going round in my head all this week.  The first is that on a few occasions within the past few days, I have seen references to the story in Zen spirituality about a young man who was diligently studying the holy book and practices when a much older spiritual leader approached him and asked him what he was doing.  When the young man explained that he was studying hard in order to become a better disciple of his religion, the older, much wiser man told him the parable of the finger pointing to the moon.  He likened the moon to truth and the finger pointing the way to that truth.  He added that sadly what the young student was doing was that he was more intent on looking at the finger and missing the moon altogether.  We need to look past the pointer to see the truth.

The second incident was of my online friend Paul Leader who used to be a church leader but seven years ago opted out of organised religion.  There are occasions when people ask him back to speak to them in church buildings and he is always happy to accept.  The fact that he returns to the system that he left leaves some people a little confused.  Those who still engage in the system feel that maybe he hasn't totally left it all behind while some of those, like Paul who have emerged from oraganised church feel that he is somehow giving in and letting down the side of emergents.  It seems he can't win so he smiles and does what he feels is right for him.  


The issue as I see it is that we tend to look at the whole church thing as an end in itself when surely it is a way to the end, a pointer to the truth that is God.  Does it really matter how we reach God?  Surely the important thing is that we do connect with Father Creator.  I remember a number of years ago, when I helped in a charity shop connected to the church group where I used to go every Sunday, one of the leaders was asking how we managed to help those who came into the shop.  It was mentioned that for those who wanted, we would pray with them and try to give helpful advice and guidance.  The leader asked if we invited the customers to the church meeting on Sundays and I replied that 'No, we pray with them and leave it up to God to direct them if that is what they should be doing'.  By the reaction, I thought that maybe I had spoken in Chinese or had grown another head or something.  It's as though the only way to reach God seemed to be by attending a building on a Sunday morning; that helping people was a means of getting them into the system they call 'church' and not just because they need help.


There are many discussions, some more amicable than others, about the rights and wrongs of the practices of people of faith.  Those who are wrong are considered to be those who don't agree with our way of thinking.  We, of course are right.  But if we liken the whole issue to a pointing finger, it seems that too much time is spent on discussing what the hand is like - a young, active hand; an older, worn hand; maybe a hand of a different shade; maybe the finger is adorned with rings or painted nail.  There are many types of hand and the finger that is doing the pointing may be very good and interesting to study and look at but all the time we concentrate on the hand and finger that is pointing, we actually miss the point altogether. I'm sure that God uses many different ways to point to Him.  Why wouldn't He?  He created the whole universe so what makes us think that our way is the only way?  We have to stop looking at the finger.  That is not the truth, only the pointer.  Look past whichever finger you choose to use and look to the truth.