Negative to Positive

I have been aware this week of friends who have had to face (and still are facing) terrible tragedies in their lives through terminal illness in the family and untimely deaths of family or close friends.  It is difficult to come to terms with such situations, if we ever can.  It seems sometimes that all we can do is put on a brave face and somehow try to appear as though we are coping.  How do we pick up the pieces and carry on?  Is it possible to turn things around so that the awfulness of something that has happened can actually be of some help or benefit to someone.  It is often not until years have passed and we can look back that we see just how life has transpired since the dreadful situation pulled our world apart.

It is exactly 15 years tonight (at 1am) that the doctor who visited my husband at our home affirmed that I was now a widow.  Things would, could never be the same again.  I had overcome many difficulties in my life up to that point but this was something new that I had to face.  On many an occasion I thought that I was doing ok when suddenly from nowhere a terrible cloud seemed to engulf me and a great sadness enveloped me.  There was nothing I could do to stop it.  In time and with great gentleness, God, through friends and family guided me into some sort of life again.  Over the past 15 years, as I look back I thank God that out of the darkness and negativity gradually I saw positive things beginning to emerge.  I moved to the other end of the country after retirement and made a new life, travelling to many parts of the world and becoming part of prayer teams encouraging others in their journey with God.

With 3 other friends on a prayer team visiting the Pacific Island of New Caledonia

It is10 years ago today since the two young schoolgirls Jessica Chapman and Holly Wells were murdered in Soham, England.  And now 10 years on the parents of Holly, Kevin and Nicole Wells tell about their heartache and how they have coped with such a horrific tragedy.  They were determined not to let the death of their daughter destroy what remained of their lives while at the same time not forgetting her.  Their son Oliver, who was 2 years older than Holly, was also instrumental in bringing the family back into some sort of home life.  Because of help they received through the charity Grief Encounter, they are now patrons of the charity and earlier this year Kevin ran the London Marathon raising £14,000 for the charity.  They were also instrumental in making sure that police procedure and the keeping of records was reformed.  They were determined that something positive should come out from their sorrow like the phoenix rising from the ashes.

Kevin and Nicola Wells with their son Oliver

It is very hard at the time to see how anything good can come out of such experiences.  It is how I like to interpret the words of Paul to the Romans when he says that all things work together for the good of those that love Him.  When we allow Him to show us the way through our problems, He somehow leads us from the negative into a positive outcome as we allow Him to use the awfulness of what has happened and turn it around so that through it the world becomes a better place.  He make the dark place light, makes the negative into positive.  That is the eternal message of Calvary.

Friends

There are many emails doing the rounds that are about friends and friendship - friends for a season, special friends, those who are there for ever, those you can tell anything to etc.  I guess it depends what you really mean by friends.  The Concise Oxford Dictionary says:
friend - 1. a person with whom one enjoys mutual affection and regard. 2. a sympathiser, helper, or patron.

There are some friends you meet up with occassionally for a particular reason - a celebration or a coming together for a mutual interest while there are others you just hang out with or share a coffee with.  You want to know their news and share (in detail) what has been happening in your lives since your last meeting.  'Tell me all about it' is what we often say on such occasions.  We want to pack in as much as we can in the limited time we have before returning to our everyday commitments.  I love to have people round at our house for this reason - to share life together.

Catching up with my sister and eating, of course!

 Family gatherings in our family our great as the above photo shows my younger sister and me at my 70th celebration. 

My sister and some of her closest and special friends at her 60th celebrations.

There are those occasions when you meet with others for a specific purpose.  I have made a number of friends and had very blessed times by being with others in prayer teams going into places to encourage and help the local people.



With a prayer team in Lille, France in 2007



A number of years ago, while living in Argentina and working with the Salvaiton Army there, I remember an occasion when a man who was to be the new head of Salvation Army operations in Argentina, Uruguay and Paraguay gave his welcoming talk.  He said that when he arrived at the port, he said to a fellow passenger 'There are my friends'.  The other man asked how long he had known them and he replied that he had never met them.  The other passenger was intrigued - 'you mean they are acquaintances'.  'No', was the reply, 'they are my friends'  Although he had never met them, he knew that because they were all engaged in the same work, had the same purpose in their lives and served together to work for God that they were friends.

I have, over the past couple of years or so, followed a blog that I discovered through someone else's blog.  That's how it happens sometimes.  You know that there are some people that just seem to draw you, like a magnet, and you want to know more about them and follow their journey.  And that's how it was.  This lady and her husband are British but live in Latvia as they felt that God was leading them to be there.  Our connection has grown through the blog system and also through Facebook and recently emails.  Yesterday, I booked a flight to visit them in their home in Latvia in September and on Facebook she wrote the comment 'I'm so excited, my friend Mavis is coming to visit us in September'.  We have never met in the flesh but I know she is a friend and look forward to the time of sharing together.  Thanks Joanna!

France

I have just returned from a trip with a prayer team to Lille, France. We went only for a long weekend (travelled there Friday and returned Tuesday) but managed to pack quite a lot into our 3 days there. On the Saturday we went to a small church to pray for them as they were leafleting the area for a special musical evening this coming Saturday.

Prayer together before we went out.

What no-one knew was that in the area we were going to hand out leaflets, there was a street market that day. They are held only a couple of times a year. I guess God wanted to arrange a conversation with someone who doesn't live around there and so otherwise would not have

been in that street at that time.

Walking, praying and Liz conversing with passers-by.

Sunday morning, we returned to the small church. We were an international group as there were a number of South Koreans as well as the locals and ourselves. Some South Koreans are living in another area of Lille, training as missionaries and learning French. That weekend they were also visited by relatives who had travelled to see them. After the service we spent some time praying with individuals.

Laura and Mike pray with a local man.

On the Monday we visited an African community that had recently bought an old, broken down building and were repairing it to make a church for their community. We were able to spend some time with them, looking around and praying with them. Hopefully another team will be able to go out later to give practical help with the building and refurbishment.

What will hopefully be the new meeting place.

We went to a Creperie for our last meal together in Lille.

L-R: Me, Liz (who lives in Lille), Wes, Lesley, Laura, Mike, Margaret and Alan.