Today Mr Cameron had a message for Father’s Day – that fathers who run
away from their responsibilities should be treat the same as drink drivers and shamed for their actions. I know what he is trying to say and in an ideal world all families would be father, mother and children living happily ever after. Sadly in the real world things are often quite different. It would also be ideal if father goes out to work to provide for his family and mother stays home to look after the children but again in the real world not many people can afford to do this and also many women want to work and have a career and a life outside of the home.
Mr Cameron also says that fathers should be a part of the family and take their share of responsibilities and spend time with their children. Again in an ideal world this would happen but in the real world things are sometimes a bit different. I know of some fathers who are no longer with their partners and would love to be an important part of their children’s lives but ex-partners are not always forthcoming in making arrangements easily or giving in to regular access and not everyone can afford the cost of going to mediation or court to gain the access they long for.
Some single mothers choose not to have anything to do with their ex-partners to the point that they prefer to go without maintenance money so they don’t have any obligation to arrange access or allow any contact with them for themselves or their children. They prefer that the father walk away and leave them in peace to get on with their lives without him. Often the living off benefits is the mother’s choice and not always a lack on the father’s part.
So, yes, ideally all men will take responsibility for their children both in time and money but not all the fathers are to blame. So to all the fathers who today have not been able to see their children and who would have loved to, I just want to say, I have been thinking about you.
2 comments:
It is so easy to make assumptions and generalisations about faults and blame for situations but they don't really help. I am guessing that the government are not going to provide the money necessary for the mediation to make it possible for fathers to take a full role in difficult relationships either. As you say, we don't live in a perfect world.
No they won't provide money for mediation. All they want to do is cut back on the money they give out and seem to blame anyone and everyone. What they say at first sounds good but when you take a closer look things aren't always that straight forward and I just felt that in one statement he was judging all missing fathers as being the same when they're not.
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